By Brit Granger
Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands
Right now, my oldest is fighting with his sister about his Lego gladiator sword. My fourth is mad at my third for copying her. And my fifth just spilled something again. An argument is around every corner and shows up in most interactions these days. Everyone in this house is feeling the effects of an extended lockdown. Normal summer activities have been paused, and it just feels like there’s too much empty time this year. There’s no more normal. It leaves feelings raw and tempers short.
Can I be honest?
It’s not just my kids. It’s me too. I feel like I’m going crazy more often than not. My sin nature would have me break down and act just like my children. I feel everything they’re feeling. More than once, after unexpected tears from one of my children over seemingly nothing, my heart shouts “Me too!”
I feel the tears, the temper tantrums, the frustrations the same as they do. But I don’t act out in the same way. Most of the time.
If I am being completely honest, my temper has gotten the best of me once or twice (or more) lately. It’s never an extenuating circumstance either. It’s usually the lunch dishes being left at the table again. Or the shoes that still never make it to the shoe box. Or toys left out. Still. And if you did one of those Mother’s Day videos where you ask the kids questions about mommy, my kids’ answers would probably be different this month than they were in May.
So, what am I doing to change it? Can I change it? Can I change the heartbeat of my home, or just keep it from making a turn for the wise? YES!
If don’t keep myself in check, I am telling my kids it’s okay to lose it. I’m tearing down my house. If I yell about the dishes instead of reminding them to pick them up (and then instituting changes to make that a better habit), I’m telling my kids it’s okay to yell when things don’t go their way. I’m tearing down my house. If I allow the tv to babysit all the time because I just can’t anymore (a valid option occasionally, but not all the time) I am not building my house.
The thing about building is, it’s hard. It’s work. Even a master craftsman will tell you it takes time and effort. Each choice we make towards building is a step towards and end goal of a finished work. You see, each choice I make is building up or tearing down; there’s no in between. I don’t have to remind any mother that there are no pause buttons during the day. Our only options are building up or tearing down.
So I encourage you today to make the choice to build.
And when we stumble in those efforts, because we will, take a breath. And build again. Ask your Father for help; He’s gives wisdom to all men liberally. (One of my favorite verses.) So take Him up on it. Ask for the wisdom to build your house. You’ve got this, Momma!
Brit is a passionate supporter of Home-Building and Mommy-Building. She homeschools her five children and fills her days with the great adventures that come with child rearing. She is a musician and amateur writer. Her proudest roles are wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend.