By, Renee Bryant
Staying connected with our college kids can sometimes be a challenge. It seems they hit the ground running, and we may only hear from them when they are in need.
It is not uncommon for family relationships to go through a transition when our children become college students. In fact, this transition can be a unique opportunity to begin to set the tone for the kind of relationship we hope to have with our children as they become adults.
Just as our relationship with our Heavenly Father grows and changes as we mature in our walk with Him, it is good and healthy for our relationships with our children to grow and change. To encourage this growth and nurture this transition, look for opportunities to:
1. Live out your faith. Entrust God with the care and protection of your student. Do you believe the safest place for your child to be is in the center of God’s will for his life? If so, join him in that step of faith and go there. Then, when challenges come, and they will; you and your student’s faith will be strengthened by the assurance he is exactly where God wants him to be.
2. Have the conversation. Talk about how to choose friends with godly values and character, how to say “yes” and “no” and discuss the discernment to know when to apply the correct answer, how to pray specifically, how to know when to wait on God and when to move, etc. Don’t be afraid of hard conversations, for if you are unwilling to talk about something, they will find someone who is.
3. Ask specific questions. Inquire about friends, projects, work, classes, challenges they may be facing, or what God is teaching them. Pray specifically for those requests and note when God answers those prayers. Pray scripture over your student. Colossians 1:9-12 is a passage I have prayed for my children for years.
4. Let them face challenges. Growth requires that students take ownership for the challenges they face. We can give prayer support, allow them to ask questions about faith and be a safe place for hard conversations when needed. Seeing your child grow through struggles is never easy, but when their faith is strengthened as a result of their experience—their faith becomes their own.
5. Keep it real. Text a verse (Ps 42:8) of encouragement or share a song (Big Enough—Clark family) that has blessed you, but skip the quick/easy answers and platitudes. The things you share that truly speak to or touch your heart will be ones that resonate with your student. Your genuine, sincere love for the Lord and what He is teaching you will be a true encouragement.
6. Find a devotional app that allow users to do Bible studies together, share a digital document, page or blog to stay connected. The key is to keep it realistic and doable.
Just as God, our Father, is always there for us, we can be strive to be a dependable source of encouragement for the college students God has gifted to us. This transition from high school to college creates an opportunity for both parents and students to take ownership of our faith and practice trusting our Lord.
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